Master Dale's Lifestyle Community Bulletin Board: Male Submissives - Master Dale's Lifestyle Community Bulletin Board

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Male Submissives

#16 User is offline   serenity Icon

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Posted 03 November 2004 - 05:33 PM

Welcome nithran, bootman, and dennis, it's great to see a few male subs posting and getting to know one another. I know it seems a bit quiet in here but with your help this could be a fantastic area that could grow into somthing you have created. Please feel free to post anywhere on the board and reply to anything you wish, ask all the questions you want and expect some great answers there are many good people here.

*giving you all big hugs and kisses on the cheek* :skotc:

Serenity
I generally avoid temptation, unless I can't resist it.

"Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns. I am thankful that thorns have roses." ~Allophones Karr
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#17 User is offline   nithran Icon

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Posted 04 November 2004 - 01:37 AM

i hope so, don't want to get taken advantage of.. used maybe though ;)
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#18 User is offline   James Icon

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Posted 14 November 2004 - 05:41 PM

Hi everyone,

I'm so glad to see this topic of discussion here. Even going to the Dominant Women/submissive men group at TES here in NYC, the males don't really talk at all. Myself, I identify as a male submissive who can Top rather than a switch. I'd like to hear from other males as well as perhaps a little guidance from the Dommes in things like proper etiquette and protocol, as well as tips on what to do about sensitive parts after a heavy scene. Do we refuse to safeword when we know we should because we want to show we are men..lol..there really are a lot of things to talk about.

I want to thank Master Dale again for his great presentation at DSF in NYC, my Domme friend was so inspired She really got evil with me! I'd really like to be found acceptable for a Dominant to own one day, and learning as much as I can hopefully will help me in that regard as well as being a more pleasing bottom.

James
"I went to a restaurant that advertised 'Breakfast at any time', so I ordered french toast during the Renaissance." - Stephen Wright
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#19 User is offline   MasterDale Icon

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Posted 14 November 2004 - 05:49 PM

Thanks so much, James. From what I have been hearing, I inspired a lot of evil play *lol* But that's a good thing :wigglebrow:

Please be patient. Not all of our members come in every day. It might take a little time for people who will want to answer your post to see it. But I think you will get some good feedback.

M. Dale
Be careful of what you wish for....Posted Image ....you just might get it.
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#20 User is offline   Ms. Shelley Icon

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:11 PM

Hey Ya's folks........

I feel all of the Ladies pain when they ask where the hell are all the boyz.........I've finally found a purty good one thank Godesses above........;)

There are actually alot of male submissives out there, it's just the degree of submission that I find to question most times.....these most times they just want you to beat them, then fuck em.....blah blah........boring.....I want your mind first, then maybe if I want to have more fun with you I'll play with your ass with my toys......

I guess I'm too picky on sub vs bottom vs masochist vs slave............I have a masochistic pain slut for a slave, so yes he's fun to play with, but, if I dind't have him in his place before I played with him the first time he would have ZERO respect for me.
D/s comes first in my book~
Ms. Shelley
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#21 User is offline   Ms. Shelley Icon

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:15 PM

James, on Nov 14 2004, 05:41 PM, said:

Do we refuse to safeword when we know we should because we want to show we are men..lol..there really are a lot of things to talk about.
James

This is something I can truthfully answer for mine.......he will not safeword, as he just plain refuses to break. He's a bitch.....LOL

Men in general safe less than women for the "I'm a man & I can take it factor", but I've certainly figured out my slave's body language to know when enuff is enuff......that's IMHO what a good Dominant does that has a sub that refuses to safe......

Just my thoughts.....

Ms. Shelley
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#22 User is offline   The Grey One Icon

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:48 PM

When I was a sub I safe worded. After a sever flogging she used that horrible thing called the "Wartenberg Wheel" with all the sharp points. Could not handle it.

Other than that I had a sub safeword out when she thought there was something wrong with me. There wasn't. I was just going very very slowly and lightly for over 30 minutes to mess with her mind. So in a way I was succesful.
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#23 User is offline   Michael's jewel Icon

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Posted 03 October 2005 - 08:14 AM

Hello, Steve!

i have this way of latching unto something and not being able to let go until it is clarifyied for me. i think that i am misreading this and wont be sure unless i ask.

Are you saying that usage of a safe word would not be a successful scene?

Knowing how many newbies and novices we have here on the board, i would really hate for anyone to feel that their using a word put into place as a safety net is a failure.
"For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart.
It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul."

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#24 User is offline   The Grey One Icon

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Posted 03 October 2005 - 08:45 AM

Hi Ya fern
No, I did not mean to imply that at all.
For me: The usage of a safe word could mean anything from ?my hands are numb? to ?I can?t take much or any more?. It should never carry the onus of something negative occurred.

Thanks for asking. Always feel free to question, contradict or correct anything I write.
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#25 User is offline   Michael Icon

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Posted 03 October 2005 - 09:10 AM

Ms. Shelley

Do You ever take a sub 'refusing' to safeword as a challenge?

Would you consider it 'topping from the bottom'?

And should it/ could it be dealt with in some other way to break the sub of this mindset?

I am asking to get some more insight into this issue and look forward to your opinion. Also the opinions of anyone else who has dealt with this subject first hand.

I must state that I strongly agree with your comment about a good Dominant knowing their sub. IMHO the Dominant is ultimately responsible for the scene and its outcomes.

Thanks

Michael
When I'm sad, she comes to Me
with a thousand smiles she gives to Me free.
It's alright, she says it's alright,
take anything you want from me.
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#26 User is offline   Ginger Icon

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Posted 03 October 2005 - 09:35 PM

I have a friend who played with someone who refused to safeword. His solution was to require her to ask for every hit. It might be easy to "grit your teeth and bear it and not safeword", but I bet it's a lot more difficult to ASK for that next swing when you've really had enough.

Ginger

"At times it is strangely seductive to know the extent of your own powerlessness." Erica Jong
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#27 User is offline   The Grey One Icon

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Posted 03 October 2005 - 10:24 PM

"Please, Sir, may I have another"
Hmm,
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#28 User is offline   Michael Icon

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Posted 04 October 2005 - 10:06 AM

nice solution Ginger
there is a big difference, as you said. between accepting it and asking for it

Thanks

Michael
When I'm sad, she comes to Me
with a thousand smiles she gives to Me free.
It's alright, she says it's alright,
take anything you want from me.
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#29 User is offline   calculated Icon

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Posted 10 November 2008 - 07:51 AM

Hi,

God, it's awfully quiet around here. Formal, too. Why do I get a vague sense of danger at the thought of trying to stir up trouble on a BDSM board? Anyway, hello. I'm new to this board. It seems to be made by the same people who constructed another board I like. I'm a female, um, top dominant person thing...I'm not so used to these labels and their finer insinuations. Anyway, BDSM is a passion of mine and I'd love to discuss it with you fine people.

To be honest I'm a little worried about the scene's rules of etiquette. There seems to be a lot of ways to step on peoples' toes if I'm not careful. Do I have to remember the D/s spelling rule or is that just something to make submissives' lives harder? I'm guessing everyone abides by it. If that's so, do I risk incurring a fellow Dommes wrath if I address her as "you"? Also, would a submissive, like, explode or something if I addressed him/her as "You"?

I don't know if I'm ready for this. I'm just a simple girl who likes to hurt sexy men, that's all.

Also, I LOVE this dancing banana! :banana: Awesome!
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#30 User is offline   MasterDale Icon

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Posted 10 November 2008 - 11:41 AM

Hi calculated.

I wonder if you have the BDSM world stuffed into a stereotype. I appreciate your concerns. We all have had them. We were all new at some point, too. If you have the opportunity to do a lot of reading on our Board, you will see how very normal, caring, and human most of us are. We don't dwell on formalities, protocols or capitalizing names....we simply ask that you give everyone the same kind of respect that you would like to get for yourself. Be you. Be fair to others. Listen and respect that others may not think the way you do. These are the rules of this Board. And they are good lessons to take out into your real life.

No, this Board is unique. I have only this one to my credit and it is not associated with any others. But I am glad to hear there are more like this one out there. Knowledge is power. And by sharing what we can with others, we empower them to find their joy and fulfillment.

You mentioned..."I don't know if I'm ready for this. I'm just a simple girl who likes to hurt sexy men, that's all." I know some people who would find those admirable qualities in a woman *lol* As you read more on this Board, you will see that there are so many different ways people express their BDSM needs. It can be from mild to wild, from caring to downright cruel. The only real difference between "right" BDSM and "wrong" BDSM is the degree of consent and common sense that enters into the relationship. There are men out there that love to be hurt...and women, too. Is it something they seek as way of punishment and self hate? Or is it an outlet for them that brings them a kind of healing release? And what about the person who enjoys giving that hurt? Are they simply abusers...sick individuals who get their jollies at the expense of others? Well some are. But lots of others find a great deal of satisfaction dealing out "hurt", but giving it in a way that both people enjoy it and both people gain from it.

The BDSM world may seem to have a formality, a darkness, and an intimidating appearance to newbies and outsiders. And there really are some sub-cultures in the BDSM world which live up to that harsh stereotype. But most of the BDSM people I know....and I know LOTS of people in the BDSM world from the Europe, the US and Canada....are just regular people living their lives the same as everyone else. The only difference is, when they and their partner close the door to the bedroom, a different dynamic takes hold. And a different expression of their love and their needs takes place. This is how most BDSM people are, I think. And we are everywhere if you know where to look, privately enjoying what makes us feel whole. Most of us are not making the news or posing for the scary, sexy images that we see all across the internet. We are just regular folks. And just like regular folks, There will be some of us you like, and some you won't. You get to make friends and choose your partners in BDSM just as in regular life. Hold onto the good ones you meet and let the rest go.

This thread may not be the best place to continue this discussion, since it is specifically about male submissives. There will be other Forums here on the Board that will be appropriate, though. If you need help choosing the right Forum to post in, just PM me. Or post it where you think is right, and I can always move it to another Forum for you if necessary. I encourage you to ask your questions and dont be so afraid of stepping on toes. An honest question is not an attack. And I give you my word, I will not allow people to talk down to you in their answers. I have been keeping that promise to my Members for 5 years and I will continue doing that indefinitely.

As I said, knowledge is power. There is a lot of knowledge to be found here. Of course, nothing substitutes for experience. It is very possible that there are BDSM groups near where you live that will open up doors to that experience for you. Affiliation is the best way to access a hands-on education about techniques, protocols, and the philosophy of BDSM. Also, you get to meet people with similar interests. By getting to know people in person, you learn who the "good" people are, learn who is trustworthy and see the value of building a good reputation in your Community. A well known, well respected woman who "enjoys hurting sexy men" can find a long list of worthy play partners once she is established. That is a far better way than trolling the personal ads and worrying about what kind of freak you may have just given your name to.....

We are here to help you if we can. Welcome aboard.

M. Dale

Oh yea...it has been quiet here for a couple of weeks now. This Board does that. It comes to life for a bit, then quiets down. But all it takes is someone like yourself to start it off and ask the questions, share the stories, or pose the issue. The Members do come back and read. And they will offer up their thoughts if they feel they have something to contribute.
Be careful of what you wish for....Posted Image ....you just might get it.
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